Mantras

Thiele writes...

I first heard the mantra, “What you are not changing, you are choosing,” around this time last year. This really resonated with me as I was in the midst of many life transitions (marriage, relocation, and changing jobs). This mantra would challenge me to evaluate the things that were no longer serving me and give me some control in how I built this new phase of life. I could be deliberate about each decision – big or small. And if I stayed my course, rather than turning left or right at a crossroad, there was still intention. I could wake up and embrace the way my life looked, or I could make a change. But I certainly would not let myself get stuck looking backwards.

Although it seems I have been here much longer, I only just joined the Zentangle team in early February this year. As a new team member, I spent many hours, over the first few weeks, reading through blogs and newsletters, and watching extensive video content to get acquainted with the Zentangle philosophy. I kept hearing “No Mistakes.” It was written on the screen, it became a joke when “mistakes” were found throughout the videos, and it was common language between teacher and student… or Bijou and student. “There is no eraser,” “focus on the good,” etc. You can’t change it, so you are choosing it. Easy… or is it?

The message behind this Bijouism sounded awfully similar to the one behind my 2025 mantra, but had less deliberation behind it. “My” mantra says, “you can change it OR choose it.” Bijou says, “you can’t change it, so marvel at it.” If we bring both of these to the Zentangle practice… it is the difference between tangling with a pencil or a pen. A pencil allows for correction, a pen does not (unless you call on bronx cheer – if you know, you know).

As someone who likes to have a plan, I wasn’t sure how I felt about welcoming mistakes in my life. The concept was easier to embrace when I thought about the confined area of a tile, but putting them into practice when I stepped away from my tile, when something fell into my lap that I did not plan for? That felt hard. And it is hard.

As 2025 unfolded, I learned the difference between making a choice and controlling an outcome. There are moments when you can be deliberate, when you can plan and decide… but then life takes over, and all you can do is show up each day and see what unfolds. Some of the most significant things that happened this year were things I could hope for, work toward, even choose to invite into my life, but I couldn't make them happen. I just put one foot in front of the other and embraced what presented itself. And this is exactly what Bijou is teaching us… we can’t always control where our pen lands with our next stroke or where our foot lands with our next step, but we can control how we react to it. Smile at it, love it, cover it up with a bronx cheer, heavily shade on top of it… whatever you do, just move forward.

I spent months sitting with these two mantras, wrestling with their similarities and differences. And then, while doing something as ordinary as organizing my jewelry (a task I had been putting off), I found a way to hold both. Right there in front of me was the bracelet that my mother-in-law gifted to me almost three years ago – “No Mistakes” engraved on the top of it. I wear this bracelet often, loving the way it looks stacked with my other daily picks, but I did not always stop to appreciate the two words it displayed.

I realized that maybe we aren't always making an active choice, but whatever happens, it is not a mistake. It is life, it is a miracle, it is beautiful. When I naturally gravitate toward control (because this will always be my default), I remind myself that there is something wonderful about being human. We have the ability to close our eyes, even just for a moment, and when we open them again, we may be surprised by what is in front of us. But time keeps moving, as do our feet, and we find a way beyond that brief moment of surprise.

When I put the bracelet on today, I echoed the two words with the voice in my head… "No Mistakes." It doesn't replace my 2025 mantra; it completes it. One reminds me to be deliberate with what I can control. The other reminds me to embrace what I can't.

2025 Mantra AND "No Mistakes" Bijouism… together, they keep me moving forward, not looking back.

What is your mantra? Share in the comments for a chance to win a Mantra Band!